Lately my son and I seem to be butting heads on a daily basis. I know a lot of it stems from his becoming a man and mom still wanting to be a mommy. It is hard to cut the apron strings especially when no one else is tied to them.
This evening my son came up to me in the kitchen looking very serious and said he had a few things he wanted to talk to me about. I was a little concerned.
He went on to tell me that in his Adult Roles and Responsibilities class they were discussing communication and he felt that he and I needed to "communicate" about a few things.
Very calmly, he asked that I not interrupt him while he told me about his concerns about our relationship. Primarily the way I "mother" him to death. At least that was my interpretation, not his actual words.
I was a little stunned. A little offended. A little proud that he took the initiative to tell me what he was feeling. When I could speak again, I came back with what I think were some pretty sound responses.
After addressing his concerns, I went on to tell him about a few things that are bothering me. Basically his lack of initiative in looking for a job and a few other activities involving school. When I mention he put in an application somewhere it is like WW3 is about to erupt in the living room.
I am not sure he liked what I had to say but if he wanted us to be honest with each other, I was going to be honest.
And honestly the whole thing has me questioning my parenting skills or lack thereof. Whether or not I do more harm than good. It is all so confusing. I know there are no perfect parents, just parents trying to raise their kids the best they can.
I know my apron stings are a little tight and I need to loosen them up, after all he will be 18 in September - I think my heart skipped a few beats at the reminder. Any suggestions on letting go and dealing with growing pains?
BTW - apparently he is planning on having a similar chat with his father. Quite frankly, I am a little concerned about the fall out.